Yesterday started like any other day. I walked into my classroom, energized and ready to take on the world. I’d had a great morning—a solid cup of coffee, a smooth commute, and, honestly, it was just one of those days when I was feeling good. I greeted my students with an extra bounce in my step, big smiles, and an enthusiastic “Good morning!”
At first, it was great. The kids were excited, too, chatting more than usual, their energy building like a wave. But by midmorning, that wave was crashing down on me. The room felt chaotic—voices were louder, focus was harder to find, and I caught myself thinking, Why won’t they just calm down?
That’s when it hit me: They were feeding off my energy.
I’ve been reading Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry’s book What Happened to You?, which dives into how our experiences—especially traumatic ones—shape our behavior. One of the things the book highlights is how much our tone, energy, and presence as educators impacts the kids we work with. Even things we may not think about—like the way we smile, the tone of our voice, or how we carry ourselves—send signals to the students in front of us. Signals they pick up on and mirror, sometimes without even realizing it.
My enthusiasm that morning wasn’t bad—it came from a good place—but it taught me a powerful lesson: Our energy as teachers has a ripple effect, and that ripple doesn’t always land where or how we expect. If we come in flat and disengaged, that energy seeps into the room. Kids may become quiet or even lethargic, reflecting what we’re giving them. And, if we come in overly hyped, as I did, their energy might climb so high that it becomes unmanageable. Either way, we set the tone.
Dr. Perry’s work also emphasizes how the little things—like tone of voice or even scent—can unconsciously trigger students. A certain tone might remind them of a moment when they felt unsafe or unheard. A scent might bring back a difficult memory they didn’t even realize was buried. While we can’t control every reaction, the awareness that everything we bring into the room matters is huge.
I’ve realized that it’s not about dulling my energy or turning myself into a robot. It’s about being intentional. Excitement is great, but it needs to be balanced with calmness. I can model joy and enthusiasm for learning without accidentally creating a frenzy.
At the end of the day, our students are mirrors. They reflect the tone, attitude, and energy we bring into the room. Some days, those reflections will be exactly what we want to see, and other days, they’ll remind us to adjust our approach. And it truly is a gift to be able to model positivity, resilience, and balance for them.
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